A flirter's guide

Wednesday, January 3, 2001
Relationships


A flirter's guide (but beware!)

The following is a selection of popular chat-up lines. The list does not claim to be an accurate cross-section and most certainly offers no guarantee of success.

"I seem to have lost my telephone number, do you think I could have yours?"
Assessment: direct and in certain circumstances very effective.

"I thought you were great in the last episode of Bay Watch."
Assessment: fun, but what if she doesn't have a television?

"What a horrendous day. The only thing that could save it now is the smile of a beautiful woman. Would you give me a smile?"
Assessment: A classic line with a lot of charm, unless she has crooked teeth.

"Who does this cute little fellow belong to?"
Assessment: solid, so long as it's his or her dog. A love of animals always goes down well.

"Excuse me, but which of all the chat-up lines would you most like to hear?"
Assessment: intellectual, polite, but risky--she might demand a list of the alternatives.

"If I were to follow you all the way home, would you keep me?"
Assessment: cute, in a humble sort of way. Chance he or she might say no.

"I would love to cause you sleepless nights."
Assessment: ambiguous--do you really want to compare yourself to a nightmare?

"You're turning my software into hardware."
Assessment: very cheeky, only for computer nerds.

"I'm an organ donor, do you need anything?"
Assessment: witty enough, if you have two kidneys, that is.

He says, "You look a lot like my fourth girlfriend." She says: "How many girlfriends have you had?" He says: "Three."
Assessment: Love and maths don't mix, not very romantic.-- dpa