Fun Things to do in an Elevator

- Wave hands wildly at invisible flies buzzing around your head.

- Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.

- Shave.

- Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

- Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

- When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

- Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

- On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.

- Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

- When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now... motion sickness!"

- Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

- Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"

- Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

- Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

- Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

- Leave a box between the doors.

- Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

- Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.

- Start a sing-along.

- When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"

- Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

- Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

- Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

- If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"

- While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.